Askel paremmalla polulla..?

Hahaha. Vituttaa ja olen ylpeä itsestäni samaan aikaan. WUT? Sekosin tänään ja pidin oman pikku FYED (Fuck Your Eating Disorder) -päivän vaikkei ollutkaan tarkoitus alunperin. O__o

Aamupalalla söin puuroa, joka on mulle vallan ärsyttävä aamiainen hh-pitoisuutensa takia. No se meni ihan kivasti. Sitten menin kauppaan ostamaan eväitä ekaa työpäivää varten. Nappasin sieltä kivasti sitten mukaan sinappimajoneesikinkku hässäkkä kolmioleipäpaketin, jossa on 4 siivua leipää. VAALEAA. Mitä en yleensä tue ikinä koskaan ikinä. Söin ne töissä kaikki. Huhhuh. Normaalisti tulee huono olo.

No sitten söin illemmalla suklaapatukan onnitellakseni itseäni onnistuneesta ekasta työpäivästä aka 300kcal siitä vaan. Sitten ettei vaan jäisi liian fiksuksi niin napsin 3 siivua pullaa, kanahampurilaisen iltapalaksi ja kasvissosekeittoa perunalla lounaaksi. Ja tadaa: En ole laskenut kaloreita koska: A) En uskalla. Ja B) Tänään ei ensimmäistä kertaa puoleen vuoteen vois vähempää kiinnostaa. :P Tiedän kyllä että hujakoitsin kivasti yli, mikä näkyy nyt turvonneena mahana ja aamulla luultavasti vaa´alla yhtenä viiva kahtena lisäkilona. Ei huvittanut kuin tehdä pari vatsalihasliikettä joten I don´t give a crap for just today. Onneksi olkoon, minä! :))

Luulen että yhtenä hauskana syynä siihen miksi tänään oli ok päivä on että päätin vihdoin varata ajan lääkäriin. Lisäksi siskolla oli teoria, jonka mukaan jokainen voi painaa rauhassa maksimissaan oman pituutensa verran miinus 100. Aka jos olen 157,5cm pitkä niin FEEL FREE: voin painaa 57,5kg ja olla silti ihan söpö/nätti. No eihän se nyt aina niin mene: Onhan siinä iso ero onko ne kilot lihasta vai läskiä mutta hauska juttu silti ja kannustava. So let´s stick to it.

Huomenna pyrin pysymään siinä kasviksia niin paljon kun maha vetää ja hedelmiä ja muuten melko maltillisesti syömään -systeemissä. :P Tasapainottaahan nyt hiukan täytyy kun tänään vedin oikein koomaöverimässäykset. But still: I don´t give a damn ja oon helvetin ylpeä itsestäni kun ei huvittanut oksentaa vaikka löllyttelin tuossa peilin edessä mahaani vaikka kuinka ja pitkään ja totesin että siinäpäs onkin kiva pesukone, kuka sitä pyykkilautaa kaipaa.

Tiedän, että tämä on nyt vain yksi kultaisen ihana päivä monien tulevien set backien joukossa mutta siistiä silti ja sanat ei voi kuvailla kuinka siisti fiilis tuli. HÄHÄHÄHÄÄ, HähähähÄHÄÄ. Oon kerrankin tilanteeni puikoissa olematta ihan sekopää rajoittaja. :) Ei kait muuta. Onnea taisteluun muille saman paskamyrskyn kanssa tappeleville<3

Ora/Ane gyaru inspiration post

Hi there everybody. :) This week has been real nice and I´ve been able to eat pretty much normally. Been having a nice holiday week just lazing my ass off. I´ve been shopping, baking with bfr´s little bro and exercising even. :) Yay! Now that I´ve been eating right exercising has been in my vocabulary again. Due to the last weeks starvation my body has been taking in fats like a freaking sponge but I haven´t been that worried about it as I haven´t been otherwise stressed. We´ll see.

Anyways,I´ve been thinking of adding some ora ora /ane vibes to my look and decided to post the latest favorite´s of mine since I thinkmany like this style. :) Enjoy. Oh and up you can see Saeko Chiba´s adorable hair which I´ve been drooling for the past two weeks. Might get a new look inspired by her soon. :)

 The girl on the right looks so nice: Note to self: Buy a leopard print college shirt. Spirit Store is selling one very cute right now actually. :) I bought similar shoes already. :) Cute black overknees<3

Buy: Skull T-shirt

 I could pull something similar off using my wardrobe actually. :)

Buy:
- A T-shirt with cross print
- Faux leather pilot jacket
- Overknees (black) CHECK!

This whole outfit minus the belt: CHECK!

Buy:
- black Nikita hat

CHECK!:
- Overknees (black)
- Shorts (beige)
- Black shirt

 Buy:
- Hat
- waterfall type of red shirt
- Chain

CHECK:
- Overknee black socks
- 100 den tights
- Black anklet boots
- Leopard shirt

Buy:
- Black furry......whatever those are. You can get them from Cyber shop.
- Leopard print shoes

CHECK:
- White blouse
- bag

CHECK on the ripped jeans. Everything else goes straight under the buy section.

This outfit I´ll def try.
CHECK!:
-Beige overknees
- Black printshirts
- Beige braid-thingies

Those baby pink pumps and the outfit are to die for. :)

 Striped skirt? Yes please!

 Jacket: CHECK!

I´m down with thisparty look. Cool!

 Yayo and Maya rocking these outfits.

Hope you enjoyed these pics. They are a bit hard to come by. But I think ane/ora is an amazing and sexy style. I think I will try to make that kind of belt. Can´t order it anyway. :(

Thinspo part 1: Healthy food thinspo

 

Hello peops. :) It´s me again. Decided to start blogging partially in english now and then. This is the part 1. of my 3 parts containing thinspiration post series. I try to maintain it as healthy as I can. I wanted to make this entry mainly because I want to show you guys what goes inside my head every day. I am very anxious and preoccupied with my weight problems and poor body image. I am trying my best to make my eating habits go more toward a healthier lifestyle. I am getting better. Today I ate a muffin without feeling guilty that much. Yay.

Getting better is scaring me shitless though. Getting better would mean not counting calories and not avoiding some foods as much as now. This would propably lead to gaining weight inevitably which is what I DEFINITELY DO NOT WANT. It is scaring the fuck outta me. I am still not satisfied with my body at all. Today I bought a new scale in place of the one I broke. I was surprised to see I only weighed 55,7kg. Not as much as I thought.

 It´s like I would like to get better enough so I wouldn´t feel guilty about foods anymore but would stay lean and lead a healthy diet. That´d be amazing.

 

  Paintskilz.

Well, back to the subject. I wanted to talk about food and especially healthier foods and what foods are good for the body yet help loose weight. Remember: 70% of losing weight is done in the kitchen and only 30% while exercising. At first here are some pictures of the kind of foods which I´ve been planning to try as soon as I can. Most are lean, protein filled and have lots of zero or lowcalorie ingredients. Hope you feel inspired by thesee pics as much as I do. :) Pics via Tumblr.

Chicken, strawberry salad.

 Tunamayo with tomatoes. <3___<3 If there would be some onion added this would be my favorite dish ever.

 Broccoli, cauliflower, chicken, carrots, salad and cucumber.

 I dunno what but it looks goood. :)

 Snacktime anyone?

Vegetable filled wholewheat tortillas.

The fridge I´d like to have.

 Avocado and strawberries. Avocado: Good fats, strawberries: Zero calories while containing more vitamin C than an orange.

 Ruisleipää ja päärynää. :3

 Noms. :)
 And below my favorite homemade dinner: Mexican style soup. Very hot and extremely satisfying<3

 Upper you can find some info about what your plate should look like etc. I personally loved the healthier way to do something awesome pics. :) I think I will reach the state of body that I want by this time next year.

I am thinking about making this kind of a Thinspo notebook with lean recipes and inspiring tips, some meal planning routines and beautiful pictures so I can tote it around with me and whenever I am about to slip or can´t figure out what to eat I could just look it up easily and find my favorites there. *__*

 Here´s a small picture of me with Siiri when I still weighed 60,0kg.

And here I am weighing about 54,0kg. :P Thanks for reading. More talk next time, less photos. ;)

To be continued....

Next time we talk about muscle training that helps in losing weight and how to make it part of your daily life (still working on that myself too). :D What is hard in it, what kind of training is the best for starters when you start at a scratch like I do. So long!